It can be creepy and outright embarrassing to catch someone staring at you.
However, you can lighten the tension by providing funny remarks rather than saying things to heighten the awkwardness or creepiness.
You don’t know laughable things you can say?
You don’t have to worry. In this article, I’ll be providing you with amusing things you can say when someone gawks at you. They’re great lines you can use to lightly pass your disapproval while giving everyone something to laugh about.
50 Funny Things to Say When Someone Stares at You
Below are 50 Things you can say when someone looks intensely at you:
- Haven’t you seen a pretty girl before?
- I bet you just got new eyes
- I hope you see me in your dreams every night after today
- Hello, my beauty is a bit overwhelming, right?
- It’s alright, I guess you must be looking for your lost senses on my face
- Are you trying to figure out if I am your estranged wife?
- Are your brain cells on my face?
- Oh, I didn’t realize I’m now a Celebrity
- You must be trying to hypnotize me, I’m sorry it’s not working
- Is this your first time seeing a walking legend?
- You know if you keep staring like that, I might be tempted to help you close your mouth
- You could have just said “Hi,” the worst I’d do is ignore you
- Do I look like your favorite dish?
- Stop staring, it doesn’t suit you
- Just take a picture, at least you’ll have me with you forever
- Staring can’t help you see what’s inside
- Keep looking and I might just be tempted to use your eyes for magic
- You could just ask for my autograph you know, and I would still say “no”
- Do I have your testicles on my face?
- Is your last night dinner on my face?
- You look familiar, too; what zoo were you released from?
- It’s alright, I understand you’re just seeing beauty for the first time
- You should come closer so you see better
- What if I stretch my arms and pluck out your eyes?
- Aren’t you afraid you could disappear for staring at a stranger this hard
- Did we do chemistry together, I could swear we just had one
- I appreciate the attention, but your eyes are getting too big
- You could lose your eyes from staring you know
- It’s $30 for a second
- I know I’m pretty you don’t have to make it obvious
- You could stare without your mouth open you know
- If you’re looking for attention it’s not on my forehead
- If you like what you see, you should ask for the price
- You should stop staring, the price is above you
- Are you trying to see through me? It isn’t working though
- Keep staring, you might find what you’re looking for
- Is the view too gorgeous?
- Quit staring and make a move, I don’t mind
- You should move a bit closer, aren’t you straining your eyes?
- Am I with your kidneys? Why are you staring so hard?
- Can I help you with something? Maybe your brain?
- I promise I won’t disappear, just quit with the look
- Has my aura hypnotized you?
- You seem lost in my eyes, can I help you find your way to my heart?
- I knew it, my pals told me I was destined for the limelight
- Just blink, I won’t disappear
- I forgive you, I know you hardly see spectacular people
- Yet to solve the mystery? You could just ask
- I’m not Jesus, you know
- Do you want to stare me to death?
Haven’t you seen a pretty girl before?
This question is a playful way to call someone staring at you to order while complimenting yourself as a lady.
I bet you just got new eyes
“I bet you just got new eyes ” is another gentle reproach to use on someone staring at you.
Also, it’ll certainly leave the comical effect you want, as it implies they’re staring at you because they just learned to use their eyes.
I hope you see me in your dreams every night after today
A smart thing to say to someone leering at you. Depending on your intention and your tone, this statement can be both creepy and flirty.
Moreover, the humor is in them figuring out what you mean.
Hello, my beauty is a bit overwhelming, right?
Here’s another suitable reply for someone who stares at you. It’s a funny way to get them to break the stare and also compliment yourself.
Moreover, it shows confidence in yourself.
It’s alright, I guess you must be looking for your lost senses on my face
This one is a little bit harsh, but it’s still quite comical. Saying that it’s alright shows you understand their gaze.
Then adding that they’re looking for their lost senses implies they’re staring because they lack sense.
Are you trying to figure out if I am your estranged wife?
“Are you trying to figure out I am your estranged wife?” is another interesting thing to ask someone staring at you.
As a lady, this question will work adequately for a guy you caught staring at you.
Are your brain cells on my face?
“Are your brain cells on my face?” is another hilarious thing to ask someone staring at you. It’s a funny way to suggest that they lack sense. It’ll certainly leave everyone in laughter.
Oh, I didn’t realize I’m now a Celebrity
“Oh, I didn’t realize I’m now a Celebrity” is another funny response to someone you catch looking at you.
Also, it’s the perfect way to praise and flatter yourself.
You must be trying to hypnotize me, I’m sorry it’s not working
“You must be trying to hypnotize me, I’m sorry it’s not working” is another thing to say to give the person staring at you a gentle backlash.
It’s a silly response they won’t be expecting.
Is this your first time seeing a walking legend?
“Is this your first time seeing a walking legend?” is another interesting thing to say to someone staring at you. Referring to yourself as a walking legend is sure to elicit some chuckles.
You know if you keep staring like that, I might be tempted to help you close your mouth
This one will work adequately for someone staring with their mouth open. It’s a playful way to make fun of them
You could have just said “Hi,” the worst I’d do is ignore you
Here’s another way to make fun of someone you caught staring at you.
This sarcastic response should elicit laughter from the audience around. Imploring them to say “hi” and warning them you’d still ignore them is the perfect way to show your displeasure at them staring at you.
Do I look like your favorite dish?
“Do I look like your favorite dish?” is another interesting one.
Of course, people look longingly at a food they love but can’t have, so this question mocks them for staring at you.
Stop staring, it doesn’t suit you
Here’s another funny thing to say to someone staring at you. This one directly asks them to stop. Adding that it doesn’t suit them pokes fun at them.
Just take a picture, at least you’ll have me with you forever
Here’s another playful but stern way to show your disapproval to someone staring at you. Telling them to take a picture is just a sarcastic way to call them to order.
Staring can’t help you see what’s inside
“Staring can’t help you see what’s inside” is another interesting way to tease someone staring at you.
This one is a silly way to call them out for their actions. Moreover, it bears truth within the layers of humor- they definitely can’t see through your clothes or your body.
Keep looking and I might just be tempted to use your eyes for magic
This statement is a hilarious way to threaten someone staring at you.
Telling them you might be tempted to use their eyes for magic is sure to bring the funny reaction you want. They should quit staring after this outburst.
You could just ask for my autograph you know, and I would still say “no”
Another funny thing to say to make fun of someone gazing openly at you. It’s a sarcastic response that’ll embarrass them.
Do I have your testicles on my face?
“Do I have your testicles on my face?” is another ridiculous one for someone looking intently at you.
This question playfully but perfectly shows your displeasure, and at the same time, it’ll cause a good laugh for others present.
Is your last night dinner on my face?
“Is your last night dinner on my face?” is another embarrassing question.
This one teases them for looking so intensely and, at the same time, calls them to order.
You look familiar, too; what zoo were you released from?
Here’s another absurd and comical question to ask someone gaping at you. This sarcastic question mocks them by implying that they’re an animal you might have met at the zoo and that’s why they’re staring like they recognize you.
It’ll surely leave everyone in laughter.
It’s alright, I understand you’re just seeing beauty for the first time
This statement is another funny way to jest at someone staring at you. It taunts by suggesting that they’ve never seen anything as beautiful as you before.
You should come closer so you see better
“You should come closer so you see better” is a perfect response. It’s a flirty thing to say to someone staring. If you like them, try this one. They might just come closer.
What if I stretch my arms and pluck out your eyes?
Here’s another ridiculous way to joke with someone staring at you. It makes fun of them by threatening to pluck out their eyes. Also, it’s an ideal response that shows your disapproval.
Aren’t you afraid you could disappear for staring at a stranger this hard
Another way to joke with someone gaping at you is to threaten them that they could disappear.
This question will work adequately to make them drop their gaze.
Did we do chemistry together, I could swear we just had one
Here’s another flirty response for someone looking intensely at you. It’s the perfect way to get them to show their interest.
I appreciate the attention, but your eyes are getting too big
“I appreciate the attention, but your eyes are getting too big” is another perfect way to jest at someone staring at you. They should drop their eyes after hearing this.
You could lose your eyes from staring you know
“You could lose your eyes for staring, you know,” is another laughable threat to leave with someone staring at you. Who would want to lose their eyes?
It’s $30 for a second
“It’s $30 for a second” is another hilarious thing to say to someone gaping at you. This one tells them they ought to pay for staring.
I know I’m pretty you don’t have to make it obvious
A simple yet comical way to dismiss someone staring at you.
You could stare without your mouth open you know
Another interesting thing to say to jest at someone staring at you. This one is for someone gaping with their mouth open. It’ll greatly embarrass them.
If you’re looking for attention it’s not on my forehead
Here’s another funny and embarrassing thing to say to someone gawking at you. It’s the perfect way to show your disapproval and get them to drop their gaze.
If you like what you see, you should ask for the price
“If you like what you see, you should ask for the price” is an amusing way to call the attention of someone looking intensely at you.
Telling them to ask for the price rather than stare gives an illustration of the right way to behave as one will behave in a store.
You should stop staring, the price is above you
“You should stop staring, the price is above you” is the perfect mocking statement to make to someone leering at you. It assumes that they can’t afford you even if they were asked to pay.
Are you trying to see through me? It isn’t working though
Here’s another perfect thing to say to playfully dismiss someone staring at you.
Keep staring, you might find what you’re looking for
“Keep staring, you might find what you’re looking for” is another way to call the attention of someone you caught gazing unapologetically at you. It makes fun of them by encouraging them to keep looking for what they’re looking for.
Is the view too gorgeous?
“Is the view too gorgeous?” is another great question to playfully engage someone staring at you. It’s the perfect question to flirt with them.
Quit staring and make a move, I don’t mind
“Quit staring and make a move, I don’t mind” is the ideal response to give a go-ahead to someone looking interestingly at you. It tells them you might also have an interest in them.
You should move a bit closer, aren’t you straining your eyes?
This one carefully mocks someone staring at you. It’s a sarcastic statement that sounds like you care. However, asking if they aren’t straining their eyes makes fun of them.
Am I with your kidneys? Why are you staring so hard?
I’m sure if you had their kidneys they’d do more than stare. However, this hilarious question will work to call them to order.
Can I help you with something? Maybe your brain?
A perfect way to playfully insult someone staring at you. It tactically suggests that they’re brainless.
I promise I won’t disappear, just quit with the look
“I promise I won’t disappear, just quit with the look” is another interesting way to joke with someone gaping at you.
It teases them, making fun of them for thinking you would disappear.
Has my aura hypnotized you?
Here’s another ideal thing to ask someone staring at you. It could be that your presence has ensnared them so that they can’t look away. You should ask this question to make sure.
You seem lost in my eyes, can I help you find your way to my heart?
Anyone who hears this one is sure to quit staring for a smile. It’s the perfect thing to say to fliry with someone staring at you.
I knew it, my pals told me I was destined for the limelight
Here’s another ridiculous response to someone staring at you. It’s the perfect thing to say to praise yourself and get everyone laughing.
Just blink, I won’t disappear
“Just blink, I won’t disappear” is another thing to say to jest at someone staring at you. It reminds them that not staring doesn’t mean they can’t see you again.
I forgive you, I know you hardly see spectacular people
Here’s another funny way to mock someone gaping at you. Telling them you understand that they hardly see spectacular people insinuates that they’re not spectacular themselves.
Yet to solve the mystery? You could just ask
Asking this question is another comical way to respond.
This question means that they are trying to solve a mystery by staring at you, so it mocks them for finding it difficult.
I’m not Jesus, you know
This statement playfully calls them out for staring, reminding them that you’re just an ordinary human like them.
Do you want to stare me to death?
“Do you want to stare me to death?” is the perfect question to show your displeasure at someone staring at you. It jokingly calls them to order.
