50 Funny Things to Say to a Nerd 

Do you know any nerds, those computer geeks, bookworms, or someone obsessed with a particular thing?

What do you say to them when you meet one? Sometimes, it can be difficult to have a conversation with a nerd. If they’re not socially awkward, then they only know things about their craft or passion.

To help you, so you don’t appear socially awkward like one, this article will be providing you with a list of funny things to say to a geek.

Whether it’s the one interested in books, a tech genius, or someone very passionate about something, you’ll enjoy teasing them with these lines.

50 Funny Things to Say to a Nerd 

1. Your book looks better than you
2. Being a nerd doesn’t mean you shouldn’t know how to talk to people
3. Do your books keep you company even at night?
4. I get afraid anytime you come out to the public and it’s not a school or library
5. I’m sure as a scientist you wear designer genes to impress your crush
6. Where’s your book? You shouldn’t move around without them 
7. Do you realize you appear naked without your books?
8. At least you don’t have to worry about looking good, everyone understands
9. At least you don’t have to worry about the outside world, there are troubles everywhere 
10. Who gets tired of each other first, you or your computer?
11. At least you won’t have to worry about heartbreak
12. So, how’s your perfect world? Any new developments
13. With you, we know our future is secured with all the necessary technology, but ensure you don’t die before then
14. At least, your computer does not scream at you, you’re lucky
15. I like that you don’t put any effort into looking good, living a nerdy life is the best
16. So, tell me, what being a nerd feels like. Any regrets?
17. Do you know CPR because my breath just ceased as you walked in
18. I want to take you home to meet my parents, you’re the high test score they’re looking for
19. I need help with my math homework, can you come home with me?
20. At least your intelligence compensates for your lack of humor
21. If you think you’re too smart, how come you lack a sense of humor 
22. You seem to have solutions to all problems, what’s your chemical formula?
23. How does it feel to be socially awkward?
24. I love your outfit, it’s weird like your hair
25. Your style and sense of humor are similar
26. I thought you were always shy, but I can see your glasses don’t let you converse well
27. So, without your glasses, you can’t think?
28. If I wear a glass too, can I join your association?
29. Do you nerds have some sort of association where you hold meetings? How come you all behave the same way?
30. Isn’t it odd always being the only odd one?
31. How does it feel when you meet someone with a much lower IQ than you? Do you run or stay?
32. Don’t you look in the mirror before you leave the house?
33. Do you have a mirror at home?
34. I can forgive your sense of dressing, I understand your type
35. Your sense of humor is as dull as your outfit
36. I love your computer, it’s cute
37. I don’t trust nerds, they know it all
38. The difference between you and a robot is that the robot has more emotions
39. If you take off your glasses, will you lose only your sight or will you lose your senses too? 
40. I think you lack vitamin me
41. You must be a computer keyboard, I just found my type in you
42. Hey Google, you have all the answers I have been looking for
43. Don’t you feel lonely whenever you’re not with your computers?
44. What do you say to your girlfriend to let her know you love her? Chemical formulas?
45. When was the last time you looked at someone so passionately like you look at your books? 
46. Are you in a relationship with your computer? 
47. If only you look as neat as your books
48. Don’t you think your computer needs a break?
49. When was the last time you took someone out like you take your books every day?
50. What cologne did you use? It smells strongly like a chemical solution

Your book looks better than you

“Your book looks better than you” is one of the funny things to say to a nerd. This remark will work for a bookworm, those who are always reading and walking around with books.

It’s a funny way to insult their appearance, stating that the book looks better in appearance. So, it’s okay to say it to a nerd who doesn’t bother about their appearance.

Being a nerd doesn’t mean you shouldn’t know how to talk to people

Here’s another observation to make about a nerd. This one is suitable for the socially awkward type, who finds it difficult to talk with others.

Do your books keep you company even at night?

Here’s another hilarious question to ask a nerd. This one teases them for always being with books, suggesting that they don’t have any relationship with people except their books.

I get afraid anytime you come out to the public and it’s not a school or library

Here’s another funny comment to make to a nerd. It’s a silly statement that suggests that they only go to the school or the library and not anywhere else. So, it’ll work for a bookworm to make fun of them.

I’m sure as a scientist you wear designer genes to impress your crush

This creative line is certainly going to get any nerdy person cracking up, except, of course, they lack a sense of humor. It’s a play on the word “genes,” which is replacing “Jeans” to mean that they dress well to get their crush’s attention.

Where’s your book? You shouldn’t move around without them 

To get a nerd embarrassed, ask them where their book is if you don’t see them with one.

Do you realize you appear naked without your books?

Another comical comment you can make to a bookworm. This one makes fun of them for being without their books.

At least you don’t have to worry about looking good, everyone understands

Leaving a funny remark about a nerd’s appearance is another way to get to them. This one here makes fun of their appearance. The fact that you sound sympathetic makes it funnier; they won’t miss the sarcasm.

At least you don’t have to worry about the outside world, there are troubles everywhere 

Here’s another sarcastic remark for a nerdy person. This line is appropriate for someone who likes staying indoors and doing their thing.

Who gets tired of each other first, you or your computer?

Here’s the perfect line for a computer nerd. It’s a ridiculous question that makes fun of them for always being with the computer.

At least you won’t have to worry about heartbreak

“At least you won’t have to worry about heartbreak” is another sarcastic comment to leave with a nerd. This line teases them for not bothering to have a lover, stating they’re free from heartbreak because of that. 

So, how’s your perfect world? Any new developments

This question is another one dripping with mockery you can ask a nerd. It pokes fun at them for always acting overly smart and intelligent.

With you, we know our future is secured with all the necessary technology, but ensure you don’t die before then

A techy is the answer for technology for our future. So, tease a techy with this statement, stressing that they’ve done well with their technological innovations. The fun is in asking them not to die before launching and enjoying the innovations.

At least, your computer does not scream at you, you’re lucky

Sounding like you’re jealous of a nerd’s habit is another laughable way to get to them. This statement about computers implies that since they only get to be with computers and not humans, they don’t have anyone to scream at them.

I like as you don’t put any effort in looking good, living a nerdy life is the best

This bomb is definitely not going to fly over their head. It’s a direct insult that’ll hit hard, stating that they never look good.

So, tell me what being a nerd feels like? Any regrets?

Here’s one question to ask a nerd to tease them. Adding if they have any regrets makes it funnier.

Do you know CPR because my breath just ceased as your walked in

This statement is one of the best ways to get a laugh out of a nerd. Making this comment immediately when they walk into a gathering should elicit a hilarious reaction.

I want to take you home to meet my parents, you’re the high test score they’re looking for

Here’s another perfect thing to say to a bookworm. It’s a way to flirt with them while complimenting them for their intelligence and good grades.

I need help with my math homework, can you come home with me?

Here’s another funny question you can use to joke with a nerd. Making this request should cause them to crack up. Moreover, you can try it with the one you’re crushing on. Who knows they might just follow you home.

At least your intelligence compensate for your lack of humor

Not all nerds lack a sense of humor. But the nerdy nerds, who know nothing about interacting with people can be a bore.  So, this sarcastic statement will cause a good laugh from those around.

If you think you’re too smart, how come you lack a sense of humor 

Here’s another interesting question to engage a need with. It mocks them for their lack of sense of humor.

You seem to have solutions to all problems, what’s your chemical formula?

Here’s another creative line you can use to joke with a nerd. If they’re the chemistry guru, they should find this joke interesting.

How does it feel being socially awkward?

“How does it feel being socially awkward?” is another amusing question to throw at a nerd to jest at them for their social difficulty. This question will embarrass them.

I love your outfit, it’s weird like your hair

This one is a double hit for a nerd, attacking both their clothes and hair style. It’s perfect for the ones with a poor sense of dress style 

Your style and sense of humor are similar

Another double hit that manages to insult their fashion sense and sense of humor. The joke here is making this statement without stating the obvious. However, with your mocking tone, they should get the message.

I thought you were always shy, but I can see your glasses doesn’t let you converse well

This is the perfect taunting remark for the ones that wear glasses. It concludes that their glasses are the culprit.

So, without your glasses, you can’t think?

This statement is another hilarious one that makes fun of nerds that wear glasses. It assumes that their glasses are what makes them smart.

If I wear a glass too, can I join your association?

This playful question will certainly leave your audience in laughter. A nerd will find it hard to come up with a perfect response.

Do you nerds have some sort of association where you hold meetings? How come you all behave the same way?

Another ridiculous question to ask a nerd that pokes fun of them for their weird behavior.

Isn’t it odd always being the only odd one?

“Isn’t it odd always being the only odd one?” sounds like you’re concerned. However, it’s just an amusing way of calling them weird.

How does it feel when you meet someone with a much lower IQ than you? Do you run or stay?

Asking a nerd if they run or stay when they meet someone with a lower IQ will elicit a comical response. I bet they’d find it hard to answer this ridiculous query.

Don’t you look at the mirror before you leave the house?

Another funny way of insulting a nerd for their appearance. This taunting question should hit hard.

Do you have a mirror at home?

“Do you have a mirror at home?” is another seemingly harmless question. However, a smart person wouldn’t miss the insult.

I can forgive your sense of dressing, I understand your type

Another funny remark to make fun of a nerd for their poor sense of dressing.

Your sense of humor is as dull as your outfit

“Your sense of humor is as dull as your outfit” is another crazy comment that insults their sense of humor and appearance.

I love your computer, it’s cute

“I love your computer, it’s cute” is something you should say when you visit a nerd. Complimenting their computer rather than them is something to cause a good laugh.

I don’t trust nerds, they know it all

“I don’t trust nerds, they know it all” is a passing comment you can make to a nerd to tease them for acting like a “know-it-all.”

The difference between you and a robot is that the robot has more emotions

Another playful joke to throw at a nerd is to compare them to a robot. Saying that a robot has more emotions than them makes it more interesting.

If you take off your glasses, will you lose only your sight or will you lose your senses too? 

This one attributes their senses to their glasses

I think you lack vitamin me

Here’s a catchy and creative line you can use to flirt with a nerd.

You must be a computer keyboard, I just found my type in you

Another hilarious but creative line you can use to tease a nerd.

Hey Google, you have all the answers I have been looking for

Call a nerd “Google” and add the rest of the sentence to flirt with one.

Don’t you feel lonely whenever you’re not with your computers?

Here’s another silly question that makes fun of a computer geek.

What do you say to your girlfriend to let her know you love her? Chemical formulas?

Here’s another interesting line you can use to tease a nerd, especially the ones who love chemistry and life science.

When was the last time you looked at someone so passionately like you look at your books? 

Another interesting line that teases a bookworm for lacking romance in their life.

Are you in a relationship with your computer? 

Here’s another silly question for a computer genius. It pokes fun at them for always being with their computer. 

If only you look as neat as your books

“If only you look as neat as your books” is another passing comment to say to a nerd laugh at their appearance.

Don’t you think your computer needs a break?

Here’s another question to taunt someone for always being with their computer.

When was the last time you took someone out like you take your books every day?

This question should leave your audience in stitches. It pokes fun at a nerd for always being with their books.

What cologne did you use? It smells strongly like a chemical solution

This comment would hit hard. A nerd should be short of words after hearing this one.