20 EMDR Questions to Ask Clients

MaryM

EMDR therapy has become one of the ways to handle post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). 

EMDR which stands for Eye-Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing is a technique that employs bilateral stimulation (BLS) to aid the brain in reprocessing certain disturbing memories.

As a therapist, certain questions are important when working with your clients. 

This process doesn’t stop at utilizing BLS, certain questions are necessary to help your client think, gain an understanding of why they feel what they feel, visit repressed memories, and prepare them for the practical session.

Therefore, if you need questions you can ask your clients during a session, this article is for you. In this guide post, I’ll be highlighting 20 EMDR questions for clients.

20 EMDR Questions to Ask Clients

There are numerous questions to ask your clients during an EMDR session. As I’ve previously mentioned, these questions are part of the therapy, which prepares them for the practical aspect.

From asking how they’re feeling at the moment, what brought them to the session, about their traumatic experiences, and their coping mechanism, to asking what they observe during BLS, these questions bring you closer to them.

Below are 20 EMDR questions for clients:

  1. How are you feeling now?
  2. Where do you want us to begin?
  3. Can you share what brought you here?
  4. Were you coerced or you came of your own will?
  5. Can you recall and share details of your traumatic experiences?
  6. How have these experiences affected you and your relationship with people?
  7. What are the triggers of these memories? How often are you triggered?
  8. What’s your typical response to these triggers?
  9. How recently have you had these triggers?
  10. How do you walk through the emotions you feel when you’re triggered 
  11. Have you developed any negative thoughts about yourself, and what are they?
  12. As you recall these memories, how would you like to think about yourself?
  13. Have you tried any coping techniques? What were they?
  14. What do you feel now as you think about it?
  15. Do you have supportive people around you, and how have they helped you?
  16. What do you hope to change by being here?
  17. Have you tried EMDR before?
  18. Are there any feelings of doubt about this technique?
  19. Do you trust me to help you?
  20. What do you observe?

How Are You Feeling Now?

EMDR Questions to Ask Clients

One of the important questions to ask your client during an EMDR session is how they’re feeling at the moment.

It’s the first thing you should ask them to determine their situation at that particular moment. Whether they feel overwhelmed, indifferent, or uncertain, this question will help you decide on the next action to take.

Many first-time clients are often edgy when they’re in front of their therapist. Some might have an I-don’t-care attitude. So, it’s left for you to get yourself into their space to know how to handle them better.

Where Do You Want Us to Begin?

Another question to ask an EMDR client is “Where do you want us to begin?” 

This question gives them the task of determining how to begin the session. Not that you lack the knowledge of how to proceed, but asking them this question is a tactic to see their enthusiasm.

Skeptical clients might tell you that you’re the therapist, so you should know what to do, while others who don’t want to be there might not be keen on talking. 

On the other hand, enthusiastic clients might tell you where to start. So, this question is ideal to determine the personality of your clients or the attitude they came with.

Can You Share What Brought You Here?

Can you share what brought you here?” is another important question to ask your client during an EMDR session. 

It’s a necessary question, as it helps you know the reason your clients are seeking you. Likely, they’re there because they want to deal with their condition, and it’s also likely that someone forced them there.

So, this question will help you know if your client understands the depth of their condition, and whether they’re ready to heal.

Were You Coerced or You Came of Your Own Will?

EMDR Questions to Ask Clients

As I’ve already established, some people reluctantly visit a therapist because they’re coerced, probably by their parents or partner.

So, asking your client whether they were forced or if they came willingly isn’t out of place. It’ll help you know how to proceed with handling them.

Can You Recall and Share Details of Your Traumatic Experiences?

Traumatic events are experiences that are not easily forgotten. Most times people can recall these memories vividly.

So, one of the things you can ask your client during an EMDR session is to request that they share these memories that are affecting them.

However, you should bear in mind that they might not be comfortable talking about these things, so you’ll need to apply wisdom when dealing with clients who are reluctant to talk.

How Have These Experiences Affected You and Your Relationship with People?

When you learn about the disturbing experiences your client had gone through, the next question you should ask them is how these experiences have impacted them.

Childhood is a very important phase in one’s life, as it affects how they turn out to be. 

Someone with a traumatic childhood is very likely to turn out withdrawn, insecure, bitter, and sometimes violent depending on the type of experience they had, except if something is done early.

So, ask your client this question to hear how these events have affected their person and their relationship with others.

What Are the Triggers of These Memories? How Often Are You Triggered?

Another important question is about the triggers of the memories.

One of the symptoms of PTSD is having flashbacks of these past experiences. And sometimes there are triggers behind them.

Some of the triggers include places, people, thoughts, sounds, smells, and anything related to past trauma.

Also, you should ask them how often they’re triggered. Is it every day? Is it when they leave the house? When they’re alone?

Learning about these experiences will help you gain more understanding of your client.

What’s Your Typical Response to These Triggers?

Another thing you should learn about your client is their responses when they’re triggered.

How do they react when they suddenly have these flashbacks? Some people might panic, others might become less aware of their environment, and several more; people typically respond differently.

So, knowing about your client’s trigger is another step in helping them.

How Recently Have You Had These Triggers?

EMDR Questions to Ask Clients

Another question you should ask your client is how recently they have been triggered.

Learning about this can also help in knowing how to handle them.

How Do You Walk Through The Emotions When You’re Triggered?

Learning about how your client handles their emotions when they’re triggered is another important step during an EMDR session.

This question is important to know the strength of your client. 

First, not everyone knows how to handle the emotions they feel when they’re faced with these memories. 

So, ask your client what they do to cope at the moment, especially when no one is around them.

Have You Developed Any Negative Thoughts About Yourself, and What Are They?

Developing negative notions about oneself is one of the consequences of a childhood void of love.

Anyone who grows up in an environment where someone constantly looks down on them and uses negative words on them, they’re likely to grow insecure with lots of negative feelings about themselves.

So, when a client meets you for EMDR therapy due to a disturbing past, one of the questions to ask them is if they have any negative notions about themselves and what they are.

Their answers will help you understand how they feel about themselves and how best to help them.

As You Recall These Memories, How Would You Like to Think About Yourself?

One of the questions that’ll help your client during an EMDR therapy session is “As you recall these memories, how would you like to think about yourself?” 

Since these memories have likely made them have negative thoughts about themselves, asking them this question will open their mind to think better of themselves.

Moreover, it positions their mind to recall these memories and ponder on them. But, rather than allow them to affect them negatively, it allows them to intentionally focus on a positive mindset.

For instance, someone who has always nursed a belief that they can’t do anything good because they’ve always heard that will begin to think and believe otherwise  

This thought is possible because you’ve opened their mind to nurture the notion that they can do something good.

Have You Tried any Coping Techniques? What Were They?

Some people before seeking therapy might’ve had coping techniques they’ve used to temporarily walk themselves through those feelings whenever they come.

Whether it’s anxiety, depression, anger, or whatever emotional or mental condition, these coping mechanisms provide temporary relief to these problems.

So, ensure to ask your client what coping techniques they’ve employed in the past and if they’ve been effective.

It’ll help you know if you’d recommend a better alternative because while therapy will provide a slow but most likely permanent relief, it’s often accompanied by coping mechanisms to do away with momentary situations.

What Do You Feel Now as You Think About It?

What do you feel now as you think about it?” is another question you should ask your client as you walk them through their past experiences.

As your client recalls these troubling memories, they’re sure to have emotions going through them. It could be anxiety, discomfort, dizziness, etc.

So, ensure you follow up with how they’re feeling, as you ask them to call back these memories, they’re trying to forget.

Mind you, these are memories that’ll be difficult to dwell on. However, the point of EMDR is to help them have these memories without anxiety and any of the negative feelings they’ve always had.

Therefore, ensure you pause to check how they feel.

Do You Have Supportive People Around You, and How Have They Helped You?

Another question you should ask your client is about the supportive people around them.

While some people might have people who care about them around and have helped them through those moments, some people are alone.

So, don’t fail to ask your client if they have supportive people around them and how they have been of help. 

What Do You Hope to Change by Being Here?

EMDR Questions to Ask Clients

Another question to ask your client during an EMDR session is “What do you hope to gain from coming here?”

Many people going through one form of disorder or the other, whether anxiety, stress, trauma or the like, wish to be better.

They know how these things affect them and their relationship with people, and they wish to be able to live a normal life without having to deal with these conditions.

So, hear from your client how they feel about their condition and what they wish for themselves.

Have You Tried EMDR Before?

You can also ask your client if they’ve tried EMDR before.

Maybe they’ve had some sessions with another therapist or it’s their first time. You can ask to know how it was with them and why they’re seeking more sessions if they’ve gone through the treatment before.

Are There Any Feelings of Doubt About This Technique?

Another question you can ask your client is if they have any doubts about the technique. This must have been after you’ve explained how the process works.

EMDR is not your regular therapy that involves just questions and some breathing techniques, it includes the use of a technique that works on the brain, bilateral stimulation.

So, tell your client what you’ll do with them and ask if they have any doubts about it.

Do You Trust Me to Help You?

Another question you should ask your clients is if they trust you to help them.

Many people go to a therapist because they’ve been asked to or they have some sort of belief in the treatment process.

However, trusting the therapist is a different ball game altogether. So, after meeting your clients, getting to know them with your questions, and them meeting you too, ask them if they trust you to help them.

What Do You Observe?

EMDR Questions to Ask Clients

What do you observe?” is a question you should ask when you begin the practical aspect of EMDR therapy.

That is when you begin bilateral stimulation. BLS is usually done by asking the client to follow your moving finger, taps on their knees, machine with lights, etc, with their eyes.

While performing BLS, you ask the client to recall the disturbing memories. So, during the process, they should notice some sensations, thoughts, emotions, distractions, and even doubts.

This question is essential to ensure you’re with them the whole process and to know when to stop or continue.

Summarily

EMDR is a technique that doesn’t work with only BLS. You’ll need to ask your client questions from time to time during the session to help you monitor the treatment process.

Moreover, it helps you learn more about them, and help them get comfortable and open their minds to getting better. 

EMDR Questions to Ask Clients

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